One Clear Dot

I’ve been thinking a lot about how perception is truth for most people.

Years ago, I worked for a public relations firm in a small-ish town in the far Washington, D.C. suburbs. One of our clients was a large bank in the area. The president of my company, the V.P. and I were invited to sit at the bank president’s table for their big annual Christmas party gala. It was a very big deal.

I was single at the time and was instructed by my boss to find a date. At the time, I had a best friend who I took to events like that with me most of the time. She took me to her events, in turn. She was, and still is, a local celebrity in the news industry. And, she was friends with my boss. It should not have shocked my boss that I would just bring along my friend.

Her response, though, was to tell me I could not bring my female friend, because, “it would look gay.” She invited no argument as she delivered this piece of sage advice, leaving my office and going back to her own.

Huh? The reality was that I am straight and so is my friend and we were seen all over town together all of the time, anyway. We weren’t gay, so why should it matter. In fact, I remember thinking, why would it matter is indeed we did happen to be gay?

So, I decided to silently turn the tables on everyone. I invited another friend to be my date. He was also a local celebrity – the main news anchor at a popular TV station. And, his reality was that he actually was gay; not that anyone aside from his trusted friends knew this.

So, I took my friend to the important bank Christmas gala and my boss was thrilled. I had added an immense measure of value to our company by bringing him along. The bank president was over-the-moon and spent the entire evening talking to my friend about sports and local news events. People at the party stared and pointed and whispered, “Is that so-and so? Wow!” He and I were the belles of the ball.

I had been told not to bring my best friend, because it would “look” gay, so instead I brought another friend who happened to “look” strait, and famous to boot. He was in on the joke and we soaked up the silent passive-aggressive nature of my actions all night long. It was bliss – even if my boss never did find out I’d pulled a bait-and-switch when it came to the perception of reality.

Posted on September 18th, 2007 by onecleardot
Filed under: The Way People Think